Recently, I wrote about traditional marriage and why it matters. This post is not about traditional marriage or same sex marriage. This post is about a different subject that affects more people. I want you to think with me about who is best at raising children. (By the way, if you would like to see my views on the subject of traditional marriage and same-sex marriage, please look at my post Why Traditional Marriage Matters.)
The studies are overwhelming that two biological parents who are married to each other are best to raise children. The benefits are astounding.
Families without two parents who are married to one another are at higher risk in most of the significant areas of life.
On the other hand, studies over the last thirty years support multiple benefits for children who live with their own married parents. In this family structure children live longer, healthier lives, do better in school, and are less violent or sexually active. In addition, children in this kind of family structure are less likely to live in poverty, do drugs, or be in trouble with the law.
Do you want to see something that is just as mind boggling? Children of unmarried, cohabitating parents are at higher risk for most of these same problems.
Family psychologist John Rosemond comes to this conclusion: “That means the real problem isn’t so much the absence of a father in the life of a child; it’s the absence of a husband. More specifically, it’s the absence of a marriage.”
Rosemond continues by stating that “nothing contributes more to a child’s sense of well-being than knowing his parents are in a vibrant, committed relationship with one another.” The next words of Rosemond blew my mind. He stated that under the circumstances of a child knowing his parents are committed to one another the child “doesn’t even need a lot of attention. More important is the fact that his parents give a lot of attention to each other.”
What an amazing conclusion. Rosemond says we need to start talking about the marriage absent home. “For a child to grow up with a father is good, but for a child to grow up with a father who is first and foremost a husband is even better.”
We are at the point in our calendar between Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. Shouldn’t we be making commitments that reinforce God’s plan for society? Doesn’t it make sense to reassess our selfishness and “me-ism?” Shouldn’t we be looking at what a firm commitment to God and His plan for the family would make?
I have no desire to condemn anyone. We all make huge mistakes. I do have a desire to see children raised with a sense of peace and well-being. One area that contributes to that sense of wholeness are parents who fear the Lord and follow His Word. I hope you will join me in reaffirmation to the things that please God.
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